Sometimes I Wonder

By Jamari Jordan

Sometimes I wonder
if I’m capable of love,
or at the very least
the ability to be content.

The dream of happiness
sailed away many moons ago.
Left in the harbor
are even more distant memories and hopes.

Sometimes I wonder,
what it means to feel,
to deafen the silence
and to ridicule pain.

Yet, here I am,
numb from refusing to feel,
guarded from shunning love,
giving joy the silent treatment.

Laughs faint,
smiles barely noticeable.
Floating through life,
but sometimes I just wonder.

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